All is Not Lost Podcast
All is Not Lost Podcast
Speaking Engagement on Mediumship: Questions, Myths, & Stories
Speaking Engagement on Mediumship: Questions, Myths & Stories
Hosted by: Psychic Medium Rianne Maldonado
Podcast: All is Not Lost
In this special episode, I’m sharing the audio from a recent speaking engagement on mediumship where I had the honor of presenting to a local metaphysical group. The talk covers three key areas that I often get asked about in my work as a professional psychic medium:
Common Questions –
What people are most curious about when it comes to mediumship
Frequent Myths – Debunking common misunderstandings around psychic work
Personal Stories – A few real-life experiences that bring these concepts to life
This episode is perfect for anyone who’s curious about how mediumship works, what it’s like to communicate with spirit, and the truth behind the work that mediums do.
In This Episode, I Cover:
- The difference between psychics and mediums
- Whether mediumship is something you’re born with or can learn
- Is it dangerous to connect with spirit?
- What spirit communication really looks like
- Myths like “mediums read people all the time” or “spirit is scary”
- A few heartfelt stories from my own experience
Special Thanks
To my son for helping with the audio, video, and tech behind the scenes—you made this recording possible!
Note for Listeners:
Since this is a live presentation, I don’t always introduce each slide topic clearly in the audio. For reference, I’ve listed many of the questions and myths discussed in the episode description.
Connect with Me:
Website: www.allisnotlostpodcast.com
Email: allisnotlostpodcast@gmail.com
If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who’s curious about the spirit world—and don’t forget to subscribe for more upcoming episodes.
Thank you for being here.
To be a Guest or suggest a Topic Idea? Be A Guest
To learn more or book a Reading with Rianne Book a Reading
To listen on YouTube
To Support our Show
You may also email us directly at allisnotlostpodcast@gmail.com
xoxo,
Rianne
Welcome back to All Is Not Lost Podcast. I'm your host, psychic medium, Rhiann Maldonado. It's been a little while since I've been behind the microphone, but I'm back today with a special episode. I'm also hoping to return to a more regular podcast schedule by mid to late July, but no promises just yet. Let's dive in. I was recently invited to give a presentation on mediumship for a metaphysical group a few towns away. and I jumped at the chance. I had such a great time putting together the slideshow and I decided to break it up into three parts. First, I covered common questions I often get as a working professional medium. Then I addressed some of the most frequent myths I've come across in the world of psychic and mediumship work. Finally, I left a little time at the end to share some personal stories. I was lucky to have my son there to help with the audio and video recording along with all the technical bits, so a huge shout out to him. Because of his support, I'm able to share this recording with you today. A couple of quick notes. While recording, I didn't always read each question or myth from my slideshow in a way that clearly separates them out for audio listeners, so I'll do my best to include a list of those questions and myths in the show notes for easy reference. Please also note that you may notice in my recording that There's an area where I have edited out a name due to confidentiality reasons, but that doesn't matter because the story is what I really want to share with you. After listening back to the recording, I got really excited about doing another presentation, especially since there were so many topics I didn't get to include this time around. So stay tuned. I've been invited to speak again later this year, likely in late fall or early winter once the snowbirds return. So with that little bit of background, let's jump right in. I'll cue up the music and then we'll head straight into the presentation. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did putting it together.
Speaker 00:Does it go? The
Speaker 01:fact is, spirit does survive death. Our loved ones are all around us. Love survives. Spirit survives. All is not lost.
Speaker 00:Welcome to the All Is Not Lost Podcast. Here's your host, psychic and evidential medium, Rian Maldonado.
Speaker 01:Thank you. Thank you. I first want to thank Deb so much for inviting me today. And thank all of you for coming out. As I was driving here from Tucson, it was 112. My friends back east, I'm like, is it winter yet? And they're like, thumbs downing me. I'm like, it's 112. So thanks so much for coming out. It's great to see all these new faces and be a part of your group. So thank you. My name is Rianne Maldonado. I am a spiritualist minister and a psychic medium. That is my son back there. He's not going to be taking pictures of any of you, but he is my roadie crew, my tech guy pictures. social media, that kind of stuff. Because I don't want any part of that. I'm like, I talk to dead people, you do the rest. So I have an outline for today because the number one thing that I find is if I go anywhere, people just want to ask me questions. They just want to know, how does it work? What does it feel like? How'd you find out? And so I've kind of developed this plan of attack for answering common questions and then debunking some myths, in my opinion. And then, depending on time, at the end, I do try to leave time for storytelling of how did I get into this? Because that is people's number one question. And I will say that I do have a podcast. I'm on a little break right now, but every episode is available, and I'll put that up. If you really are bored one day and you want to listen to an hour episode about how I got into this, it's there. And it's a wild ride. It's a wild ride. Let's see. I try not to say all the ums. It happens sometimes. So... I have learned so much from Spirit. I've learned so much about myself and about people in general on this journey, and I love to share it. I tell my husband, the minute I stop being amazed by Spirit is the minute I'm going to stop offering readings because I'm still amazed every day. I will do a reading, a private reading for somebody and just be floored at the information that comes through from Spirit. Even after all these years, it still amazes me that I can get these messages for people. And I want it to always be that way. So if it's not, then I'm not going to do it. I do private readings. I do speaking engagements. I do group events, things like that, unless I'm asked to be like a party trick. I don't do those because I take it very seriously what I do. I mean, I have fun with it, but I do take it seriously. So a little bit of, let's see, I am going to cover so many typical questions. I'm okay with you asking questions, but we kind of have to keep it going since I've only got an hour-ish. And I would like to save time at the end, because if I feel that I can do a reading for somebody, I will. But I'm always open to questions. It just might be answered. I do not get into politically charged discussions or religious topics. I am a spiritualist minister because it's the most non-religion religion. And only because of the mediumship. But I will not talk about what's going on in the world anywhere right now or what spirit thinks about that. I don't make predictions or anything like that. So please don't ask me those questions. It's just too divisive. All righty. And if you see typos, I apologize. I did this without my glasses on. And I'm just now at the age, the last couple years, where I need my readers. But then I put them on, and I got to read. And then I got to take them off to see you, and it just makes me dizzy. So just pretend you don't see them. So I get a little flack from some people that apparently love me that I do too much. And I did a whole podcast episode on this because I really believe that we're put on this planet to have experiences. And I look at it like a buffet. And let's just use the word God. You don't have to believe in God. We don't have to say God. But I'm going to just use the word God, the universe, the creator, whatever. Say we were put here. I think it would be offensive to not try things. You know, it's like you offer your children a bunch of stuff and they don't want to do anything. It's just kind of boring. So I like to learn a lot of things. I constantly learn. I go down one path and it leads me to another path. So overall though, the thing that I link all of my credentials to is help and healing for myself and others. Whether it's physical, emotional, spiritual, You know, I do Reiki, I'm a spiritualist minister, I do my podcast, I weirdly am also a licensed private investigator. Because I'm married to an ex-cop who wanted to be, and I'm a Scorpio, so we dig. And I also teach aesthetics at the Aveda Institute in Tucson. So I'm a licensed esthetician. But generally, that physical touch leads to some emotional and spiritual healing. So it all just kind of goes together. I am a wife and a mom of five kids. And I talk about the work that I do as like, on the spectrum, okay? Let's be funny for a minute. At one end of the spectrum, imagine the lady in the turban in the dark tent telling you you're gonna meet the love of your life on Tuesday, but you'll be dead on Wednesday. That's not me. Then there's this other end. I just happen to be this typical mom person who does this really weird thing. So that's the way I like to look at it. So the reason I bring that up is that I don't give you information like during a reading that I can't at least somewhat validate. The example I give is when people say, what does heaven look like? Spirit told me heaven looks like endless summer. Well, I hate summer. Like I hate, that's not heaven to me. So wherever I'm going to go, I want it to be cold, like a cabin in the woods with some snow, hot cup of coffee. So I can't tell you If spirit told me heaven looks like this or we go here when we die, I don't know that that didn't come from a dream or a movie or something. So I shy away from those kinds of things. But if I can tell you your grandmother lived in a yellow house and her favorite color is blue and she had a little white dog, that can be validated, correct? So that's more the way I try to do my work. So even though I do a lot of things and my mom says I do too much, well, you know, oh well. I don't know. I like all the things that I do. OK, so if you have questions about any of that, we can get into that later. But I just kind of wanted you to see a little bit more about me. So we're going to go over some common questions, as I mentioned, and then some myths. Because there's a lot of myths out there about what psychic mediumship is. how to reach me, and then like I said, if we have time at the end, hopefully we can do story time and maybe a reading. Okay, so a show of hands. Do you, because you guys are a metaphysical group, so I don't know what I'm working with here, but I'm assuming you know a lot, and maybe some of this is stuff you've already heard, but How many of you would say you have an understanding of the difference between a psychic and a medium? Okay, good amount of the group. Okay, so we like to say all mediums are psychic, but not all psychics are mediums. So if I'm doing a psychic reading, sometimes there's people that come to me and they just need guidance with their life. They're having trouble with a relationship or a career move or something big in their life, and they really just need guidance about their health or something like that. They will come for a psychic reading. That's where I'm going to tap into you and the feelings I get. And it's very interesting when I'm doing those kind of readings, how it comes through in my body. I'll be getting ready, let's say, to be on the phone with somebody. a new client and I have my little meditation ritual that I do, and I might notice that I start rubbing some part of my body. And I'm like, there's nothing wrong with my leg. And then I'm like, oh yeah, it's probably for my client. And I get on the phone with my client and I'm like, what's wrong with your left leg? Oh, I just had surgery. I need surgery. So that's kind of how psychic works. It's stuff like that. Mediumship is when I connect with your loved ones on the other side. So two very distinct different things. They do have some overlap. And sometimes I'll start out doing a psychic reading for somebody. And now, mind you, my mentor in England would yell at me for saying that. She's appalled at psychics. But because you should never mix. Anyway, I will sometimes be starting out doing a psychic reading for somebody and then grandma will come in or grandpa will come in and they've got something to say. So sometimes that psychic guidance that's coming from me and my spirit is then added to or complimented by somebody from the other side. But then I do pause and say, okay, this is no longer coming from me. This is coming from your grandfather, your mother, your dog, right? So those are the big differences between a psychic and a medium. So like I said, we say that all mediums are psychic, but not all psychics are mediums because you have to be somewhat psychic and tapped in to talk to spirit. But you don't have to talk to spirit to be psychic and give a psychic greeting. Make sense? Okay. So can I turn it on? on or off. I get asked this all the time. And I know that there are going to be varying opinions. Please know that everything I talk about today is just from my experience. There's no judgment. If you have another opinion or you've had another experience with it, this is really truly just how I have embraced what it is that I do. So I often hear people say, oh my gosh, I'm bombarded by spirit all the time. Oh, they're all around me all the time. They talk to me all the time. I can't sleep. I can't do this. To me and in my experience, that's poor boundaries. I'm not bombarded all the time. I'm bombarded by my children all the time. My son may be 28, but his youngest sister is nine. I have four little ones. I started over. So I don't need to be bombarded by spirit and the living. That would just be too much. So I don't necessarily need to turn it on or turn it off, but I do set boundaries. So I know, I like to joke when I'm teaching people individually or mentoring somebody that I often say, okay, you're in charge. You're alive. They're not. You're allowed to say, and I'm silly about this, I only want to have a visit from you on Tuesdays at 2 p.m. Spirit has to listen to you. If you believe that you have the boundaries, then spirit will honor your boundaries. Perfect example of this. My children all know what I do. I'm the weird mom at the school, and that's okay. But my youngest, a couple of years ago, she came screaming in the room at 5.30 in the morning, there's a man in my room! And my husband, the cop, jumps out of bed like, what are you talking about? I just knew, I'm like, it's just the spirit. And Somehow I just knew. And so I talked to her because she was a little scared. She'd been laying in her bed and she saw a man playing with her toys and then it moved over to the other side of her room. Really freaked out. She was like six or seven at the time, understandably. But what was interesting is that day, later that day, I had a Reiki client for the first time. And He was, he's profoundly deaf, and I had only known him as he had been my sign language instructor, but he has now booked a Reiki appointment with me. And often before I'm going to do a reading or a Reiki appointment or things like that, I meditate a little bit and kind of see what I'm getting, and it was weird. I didn't make the connection, but that morning laying in bed, I was hearing, like a child. Like a child. I just heard this phrase over and over in my head. So when my daughter came in, it was like a light bulb went off. This person that was in her room was not going to harm her. Later, long story short, I made the connection with my Reiki client that his uncle Nikki was visiting. And the like a child was even though he had passed in his early 40s, he had the mental capacity of an eight-year-old. So he was like a child, and he did want to play with her toys. But back to turning it off and turning it on and having boundaries, my daughter expressed very clearly, love what you do, Mom, but I don't want him in my room. And so I said, all right, let's set some boundaries. And we spoke together out loud, and she said, Spirit, you can visit my mom anytime you want. Don't come in my room. Don't talk to me. I'm not ready for it. She's never been bothered again. So you're in charge. They're not. They tend to respect that. That's my take on it. I'll get to ethics later because it's important, but this does overlap a little bit. While I can be receptive to any time, if spirit really wants to get me, they kind of will nag at me if it's important. But I, again, we'll get into this with ethics. I will not just approach a stranger and deliver a message. I just won't. So I have to set a boundary at that time that spirit, if you need me to deliver this message to that person over there, you're going to have to find a way to naturally introduce us because I am not going to just go up and deliver a message. It's just not the right thing to do. Can I read your mind? Am I sitting here looking at any of you? Reading your mind. No, I don't try to. That's too much work for me. I don't need all that information. Plus, it would probably make me scared that you don't like me or something. I don't want to think about those things. Now, obviously, if we're in an appointment and I'm sitting down across from you and I'm focusing on you, the goal is to know you and understand what's going on with you so I can help you. That's different. But do I just walk around trying to psychically spy on people? Absolutely not. Again, too It's so much work, I don't care, I don't need that much information, and it's not my business, it's rude. So I wouldn't do that. Okay, are dead people scary? I hear this so much, like, ooh, you're messing with something scary, and dead people can hurt you. In my experience and my opinion, absolutely not. The living are far scarier than the dead. 100%. Generally, I want to treat them the utmost respect and find out what they need, why they're here, what I could maybe learn from them or share about them. I do not think they're going to push me down the stairs or do bad things to me. Yet if you listen to that episode in my podcast, you will see I haven't always felt this way. That was when it was very new. and I didn't understand. Now that I've had some years of experience working with spirit, I'm 100% not afraid. Later when we get to what does it feel like, I will explain there are times that I feel afraid or yucky for a moment while I'm trying to understand what it is they want me to say or understand. But it goes away as soon as I make the connection. So I'm still far more afraid that I might be ax-murdered on the way to my car in the dark than I am of spirit pushing me downstairs or harming me. Okay, we talked about in charge and boundaries. You are in charge. So I'm not gonna go over that again. It really, if you have questions about it later, we totally can talk about it because I know that that could be a very polarizing opinion You know, if there are people who firmly believe that they're being bothered by spirit all the time, it's very hard to convince them otherwise. And it's not that it's my job to convince anybody. People need to believe what they need to believe. But that right there is kind of the crux of it. If you believe that spirit can harm you, maybe they can. I just don't believe that they can, so they don't harm me. Okay, during a reading... what and who we want versus what and who we get. So if you visit my website, there's a page on there about what to expect and how to prepare for a reading. I always say come with an open heart and an open mind. If you come to a medium or a psychic and you only want to hear from Uncle Joe and you will not be satisfied unless you hear from Uncle Joe, you may leave disappointed. And you might be like, that was the worst reading I ever had. My Uncle Joe didn't come through. Well, I cannot control... 100% who comes through. Probably not even 20%. I can try. But the universe gives us what we need, not always what we want. And so we really, really have to be open to what we're supposed to hear. Sometimes, though, I'll start with a client and I'll be delivering some information. It'll all be going great. And then it's kind of like, run its course for that time but we have some time left i usually allot a certain amount of time for a private reading and towards the end i might say was there somebody else that you wanted to hear from today that you were hoping would come through and sometimes they're like yeah i was really hoping you know my mom would come through and so i'll say can i have your mom's name please and i'll write it on my little notepad and then i'll focus for a minute and i will invite mom to come through and see if there's anything mom has to say. And sometimes, more often than not, we'll get a little something validating for that person just to know it's a hello from mom, whatever she has to say to send this person off from their appointment. feeling like they got not only what they needed, but a little bit of something that they wanted. So anytime you go for a reading, just know that it's okay to totally have a want. Be open to what you need, though, as well. Okay. This is like number one party question. What does it feel like? So every medium... or psychic will probably tell you a different story, how it feels for them. So for me, it doesn't hurt. Even if I have to tell you how your loved one passed, I might feel like a shortness of breath. I might feel liquid in my lungs. I might be like, oh, this was like COPD. This was pneumonia. This was breast cancer in the left breast. I'm very aware I might have trouble catching my breath for a minute, but I never feel harmed or like I'm not gonna be able to breathe. It's just enough that I'm able to express it to you. Again, like I said too, I might be getting a pain somewhere. It's not an actual pain like, oh gosh, I can't walk. It's more like my attention is being drawn to a certain part of my body. That said, I've had two instances where my feelings were so strong I almost could not go do the readings. I was on my way to a group reading one time. Well, actually, let me back up and start with this one. One time, my family and I, we were out to lunch, and I had a group reading that evening. So we were going to have lunch, go home, and just kind of prepare and relax a little bit and do my meditations and get ready. But in the restaurant, All of a sudden, I had the most overwhelming sense that I had to go to sleep right now. It was so bad that my family wanted to order dessert. And I'm like, I got to go to the car. You all have dessert, but I have to go to the car. There was nothing that could have kept me in that restaurant and kept me awake. My body was shutting down. I had to go lay down. So I got in the car and I was instantly snoring. So my family comes to the car with her to go, milkshakes, and we're getting in, and we're driving home. I slept the entire way home. We walked in the house, and I'm a big no shoes in the house person. Kind of grosses me out. Definitely no shoes on the couch. I walked straight to the couch with my boots on and went to sleep. I have little kids. They're loud. I have dogs. I don't know how I did this, but it was freaking me out because I'm like, how am I going to do this reading tonight? Like, I'm so tired. Snoring on the couch, asleep. One of my daughters wakes me up. She's like, mom, it's almost time for you to leave for your reading. So I get myself up. I'm like, okay. Brush my teeth, get myself cleaned up. And I look at my husband. I'm like, I don't know if I can do this tonight. And he's like, it's your client. I'm like, oh my God, it is. And then I felt better enough to drive there. But the minute I got into the house... I said, before we get started, before my spiel, before everything, who's got the problem with fatigue? Because you almost made me not come tonight. And it was a woman in the family who didn't want anyone to know that she was ill. And it ended up being so beautiful because her family was there to support her. So does it hurt? No. But sometimes it's insane. There was one other time on another group reading, on my way driving, I had to pull over in a parking lot because I was having a panic attack. My anxiety was so high, I was shaking. And I pulled over. I tried to drink water. I tried all my breathing exercises. I called my husband. I'm like, I don't think I can do this. You need to know where I am because if this panic attack gets so bad I can't drive, I need you to come get me. And again, the voice of reason, it's for your reading tonight. I'm like, oh, okay. So same exact thing. I walk in the house. It's a group of sisters that once a year they get together from all over the country. They rent an Airbnb and then they do some form of entertainment or bonding experience, and I was the entertainment. But I had to walk in and say, before we get started, who's got the overwhelming anxiety? So that's how it feels. But also, I didn't realize this until I saw a recording of myself doing readings. I tend to get the information through all of my senses. So some people, you know... Clairvoyant, some clairaudient. I tend to have most of them. The one I have the most of is feeling, clairsentient. They don't have to have the fancy names. They just feel stuff. But I do, after watching that video, I did notice that I deliver my information by saying things like, oh, they're telling me this. Or she's showing me this. Or I'm feeling this. I was using all my sense words. Or I'm smelling this. I often will do a mannerism that isn't mine. So I was in Lilydale, New York for a seminar and I was doing a reading for a lady. I was sitting there like this talking to her about Aunt Carol for like 30 minutes. And I'm just like, Aunt Carol did this and Aunt Carol did that. And she's like, yep, yep, that's Aunt Carol. And all of a sudden I'm like, Aunt Carol is a chain smoker. And she's like, oh my gosh, she was never without a cigarette. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. But there I was holding that cigarette. So I also work at a spa in Phoenix every now and then. I'm just their on-call esthetician. And one of the other estheticians, she desperately wanted me to do a reading. And I try not to do them like that because it just kind of cheapens the experience. But I was getting a message from her mom. And I was doing this. I was just rubbing my face weirdly. And I'm an esthetician, so I don't touch my face. Like, don't touch your face. You get yuckies. But there I was touching my face. And I'm delivering this message to Louise. And I'm like, why is your mom making me touch my face? And she said, my mom had PCOS. So if any of you women know what that is, polycystic ovarian syndrome, it's a problem with the ovaries where you tend to grow facial hair. Her mom had a ton of facial hair that really, really disturbed her, understandably. She was validating. I have no idea why I was rubbing my face, but Louise did. So what does it feel like? It feels like all kinds of things. But it's not scary. It's just interesting. But the minute I recognize, it goes away. So I no longer have to feel it. So I don't have to sit there for a long time feeling the COPD or feeling the pain. It subsides the minute I say, did your person have this? And if you say yes, I'm like, OK, thank you for letting me. Breathe again. OK. This one is one of my favorites to talk about. A spirit just hid his face in other signs. So there are some great books out there about signs from the universe, signs from spirit. We've all heard about pennies and dimes and butterflies and dragonflies and all these things. And they're all possible. Your spirit person will send whatever signs mean something to you. And don't let anybody invalidate that for you. And it might be very different than mine or your neighbor's. That's totally fine. But signs and symbols are very specific to the medium. Also, we have our own. Let me give you an example. Say I'm sitting down with you and I see a red apple. Now to one medium, that might mean New York. To another medium, that might mean their spirit person was a teacher. So each person has to learn what their signs and symbols are for them. So I use this example because it was one of the most profound for me when I finally figured out what it was. I was doing a reading really, really in the beginning when I was first putting myself out there. And it was over the internet. Yeah, it was over the internet. I don't even know where the lady was. I don't remember much about it. But I do remember I had her grandfather there. He was a Hispanic man, nice looking. He loved to dance because he was showing me dancing. And he was showing me that he had a wife who was still alive. But he was showing me all these things. And it was great. And I was validating all of it with my client. And then all of a sudden, he turned away from me. He just showed me his back. And then I heard another family. And I was like, what the heck is this? What does this mean? Why did he turn away from me? And what is he saying? And that's another thing about doing the kind of work that I do. How do you deliver a message that might be yucky? How am I going to say to this granddaughter, did your grandpa have another family? Because awkward. But I also have to deliver what Spirit's telling me. So anyway, lo and behold, he did. He had a complete other family in town. And so my client's mom, when her and her sisters were young, would go to school, and there'd be other kids that would say, why was your dad at my house last night? So I started to wonder at that point, because this is the first time that happened to me, was he hiding his face because he was ashamed? So I just made a little note. in my book. Few years later, I'm sure there were more in the middle, but these are the ones that stand out the most that are the most impressive. I was invited to come read for a family in Tucson. And the spirit that was coming through was for the husband that I was there with. And his wife was there taking notes. And my husband was there taking notes because he used to be a skeptic. And I'm getting my client's brother. So I'm describing him. He's tall. He's handsome. He's got a beard and a mustache. He's standing in a lush green yard. The fence is about this high. There's a little girl on a swing next to him. She's still alive. Everything, he's like, yep, yep, yep. That's my brother. That's my brother. And then all of a sudden, he turns away. And now I've remembered back to the other family guy. And I said, why'd your brother just turn away from me? What's he ashamed of? What did he do? And he said, he stole my wife. His twin brother took his wife and was still married to her till he died. So that's something to be ashamed of. So this is now I understand 100% that when a spirit turns away from me, they're telling me they're sorry. They feel guilty. They want forgiveness. Sometimes they don't. Sometimes they're just like, yeah, I did this thing. But that's what that means. So signs and symbols can be anything. And one of the most exciting experiences I've had with signs and symbols I was doing another phone reading for a lady in Oro Valley. We met at a restaurant, and we were sitting at the community table. And it's funny how energy just draws people together, because I'll talk to anybody. But this lady, I just wanted to talk to her. And she wanted to talk to me. And I was like, that's dandy, because my husband was on his phone. So we start talking. We hit it off. She finds out what I do. We exchange numbers, and we go our separate ways. Finally, one day, she calls me, though, and she wants a reading. So we set it up. We're on the phone. And man, all this fantastic information comes through. Sometimes there's readings that are like pulling teeth. I'm like, oh my God, please talk to me. And other times I'm like, slow down, slow down. I can't say it that fast. This was one of those so fast. He was showing me his motorcycle, his Hawaiian shirts, how 500 people showed up to his funeral all wearing Hawaiian shirts. Like it was the most impressive I've ever had a spirit talk to me. And even with all of this, and all of this other conversation I had with his wife about all the great things they did, that he showed me them camping, and they even have those camping chairs that are actually attached. They'd have their drinks, they'd watch the sunset, and they're camping by their camper. Like, it was everything. She's like, but I don't know if he's around me. I don't think he sends me signs. And I knew right then, because he's telling me, I send her signs all the time. She just doesn't see them. She's being stubborn. So I said to him, Send me a sign. Tell me what her sign is. And right then, I said, okay, yellow bird. I said, here's what I'm going to show you. I'm seeing a big sliding glass door. And outside, I'm seeing it as if you're inside the house looking out the glass door, and there is pottery with a cactus. And on that cactus is a yellow bird. That is his sign. He's with you all the time on this cactus in your backyard. She gasped. She said, I'm sitting in front of the sliding glass door right now, and a yellow bird just landed on the cactus. And I was like, send me a picture, because no one's going to believe this story. No one's going to believe this story. Real time, her husband sent that yellow bird. I got goosebumps on my cheeks. Don't touch your face. Real time he sent that. So the thing about signs and symbols is sometimes we're still grieving and we can't see them. Sometimes we rationalize them away because we don't want to believe we're scared. It doesn't mean they're not sending them. It means we need to look for them. I also say, ask for them. Tell your loved one, I'm struggling. I need to hear from you. I want to see a purple elephant in the next three days. And no joke, you'll be at a store and there'll be a card on the rack with a purple elephant because your person is listening. You often aren't. So signs and symbols are a big thing. And it could be the funniest thing. It doesn't have to make sense to anybody but you and your person. Your grandma's giving me the side eye. I do not know how many times I've been in a reading. So I have a home office, and then I have an office that I share with a woman who came and spoke to you recently, Michelle. And I'll be sitting there, and I'll get comfortable. I'll have my coffee, light some candles, and I'll be reading for somebody. And it'll be grandma. And all of a sudden, I'm sitting up. And one time, I even buttoned my shirt. A little more. And then it started dawning on me, kind of like the man who turned away. Grandma has manners and she wants me to sit up straight. She says I'm showing too much and I got a butt in my shirt. So I will say to my guest, my client, your grandma was proper, wasn't she? And she's like, oh yeah, we had to sit up straight. We had to dress well. I said, your grandma is dressed pristinely. There is not a wrinkle. Everything's perfect. So it's funny. Sometimes they will come through so much with the same personality that that's the validation. And they will make me do things like that that, again, I won't even realize I'm doing it for a minute. And all of a sudden, I'm like, oh, this isn't me. She's making me sit up straight. She's making me do this or that. They've... spirit has made me do some funny, interesting things like that. So they can still have some impact on us from the other side. So some spirits are chatty, others ghost me. Ha ha, that was just a little joke. So I noticed early on, as I mentioned before, sometimes spirits will give me so much information I cannot say it fast enough, and I have to slow them down or scribble some so I don't forget. Others, I'm like, oh my god, these people spent money on me, and you're not showing up? Start talking. And what I have learned are there are reasons why some people are quiet on the other side. Sometimes they were quiet in life, and they just didn't want to be the center of attention. And that just carried over onto the other side. And they're not chatty. They're more reserved people. They're not the front of the line people. And they're just quieter. And it's a little harder to get information from them. And I kind of have to do it a different way. I have to ask them, OK, show me something. If you don't want to talk to me, show me something or make me feel something. I need your person to know that you're here and that you're OK. Other reasons why they don't talk to me, I've realized, is religion. And I said we weren't going to talk religion, and we aren't. But I have found some people, especially older generations, if they were very religious and this kind of stuff would have made them uncomfortable, they won't talk to me. And so I will have to ask my client, was your grandmother very, very into her church? Oh yes, her faith was everything to her. Okay, that could explain why she's not wanting to talk to me. And then I can usually work with spirit. I can usually tell them, because this is true, I only work in the light. Whatever everybody else wants to call it or say about it, I say a prayer before I do readings. I do believe in God. I work in the light and generally spirit will work with me. But that happens sometimes. And once we, kind of like the pains in my body, once we tackle why they're being quiet, they'll generally start to talk to me. So religious upbringing, or some people are just scared. If the person in spirit thinks this is dangerous or that I'm doing something that's not okay, Sometimes they're the quieter ones, more often than not. But we can usually work through it. Other times it's funny. I'll be connected with somebody and I'll be like, your person thinks it's hilarious that you're talking to me. And they're like, yep, that makes sense. They think this is ridiculous and that you don't need this or this is foofy. Yep, that's true. I'm like, well, here we are. Let me tell you about your person. So that's just kind of a funny thing to talk about is our personalities change. do carry over, but I wanna make a side note to that. I believe, and from experience, two things. Have a drink of water real quick. One, I believe that when we cross over, we do have the ability to do good things. Even if we didn't do the greatest of things here on Earth, I don't think it's the end of the line for us. I think we can redeem ourselves by doing certain things on the other side. The flip side of that coin is just because you die doesn't make you all-knowing and awesome at everything. So if Aunt Susie gave you terrible advice in life, she might still give you terrible advice in death. We still have free will, and we've got to kind of pay attention to that. And that leads me to that one. Are we all knowing when we die? No. Yes and no. Sure, they can see things. Your mom might come to me and tell me, you're struggling with your left foot right now, and you have a photo on your mantle of you and your dog at a park. So they can show us that they know what's going on in our lives. But do they know everything about how the world works? I don't know. Do they give good advice? I don't know, sometimes. OK, next one, because look, I'm talking too much. I'm going too slow. Do I use tools in my readings? So tools, I mean like tarot cards. Yes, I decorated my whole thing with tarot cards, because it's really hard to find spiritual templates. Tarot cards, Ouija boards, things like that. A lot of mixed feelings on that. So when I first got started in this kind of work, I was terrified. I was like, nope. Somebody told me I was a medium. It was too scary. I didn't want to do it. She introduced me to some angel cards. I was scared of tarot cards. But I started with angel cards. And I kind of went down this path. And then fast forward a few years later, I'm like the tarot card reader for the city of Tucson. I'm at everybody's party reading tarot cards. I got really good at it, loved it, taught classes and everything. So I had a tool that I used to get information and share it. 2019, November, I'll never forget. I was doing an event, and I was reading tarot for people throughout the day. At the end of the day, I just intuitively knew I was never going to read tarot again. I have 47,000 decks of cards. I look at them. They're beautiful. They're on my shelves in my living room. I don't read tarot. I don't even remember. When I pull out a deck, I'm like, I couldn't read for you right now if I tried. I don't need them anymore. I don't like to use the word gift. We might have time to get into that. Whatever it is that I have that I use changed. And I no longer need the cards. And what I realized one day is I was doing Reiki for somebody. It was during COVID. And during that Reiki session, I started seeing things about this person. I wasn't using cards, but I was seeing things. And after the appointment, we sat down and talked about it. And I was like, can I tell you some things I saw? Usually people are asking me, what'd you see? So I laid it out there and realized I didn't use tools. I didn't need them. And a funny one here real quick. Another Reiki client at that same time. So I used to have this beautiful little Reiki room, all decorated the way I wanted it, the colors I like, my own space. Have this lady on the table that I saw all the time, like weekly. And I'm in there, I've been in this room a thousand times, right? All of a sudden, I open my eyes and I'm looking around because I smell pine trees, like Christmas trees. And I'm looking around my room like there's gonna be a pine tree. Okay, but I'm smelling pine trees as if I'm in a pine forest. So I continue the Reiki session, finish, we go out into the waiting room, we talk, and she asks me if I got anything, and I'm like, this is super weird. But I don't know if you're supposed to go up to the mountains this weekend, or you were, or you have plans, but I was really smelling pine trees. I'm like, to the point where I looked around my own room, like there's going to be a pine tree. And she's like, hmm, that's interesting. OK. And she leaves. And I think it was like a Friday night, because my family and I went to the movies that night. And I remember I'm sitting there in the movies. I got my feet up on the seat in front of me, hoping nobody's going to come in. And my phone dings. And the movie wasn't on yet, so I'm like, oh, look at my phone. It was a message from my client from that day. She got home from her appointment. Her husband had gone shopping for dinner stuff and was making dinner. But while he was at Trader Joe's, he bought a balsam pine candle, and it was burning on the counter. Holy crap. I was like, oh, my gosh. Thankfully, I have this in writing, because nobody would believe that. That's when I realized really over and over these things kept happening and I knew intuitively I wasn't supposed to use the cards anymore and spirit was showing me I didn't need the cards. I'll touch on Ouija boards. I don't mess with them. I don't think we can open portals to hell. We'll get to that. I really don't because I think you have to believe in that stuff for it to happen and I choose not to believe. But my husband's Hispanic. He's like, don't be conjuring things. I'm like, I don't know how to conjure. I'm like not that powerful. So here's what's interesting about Ouija boards. In England, at the Arthur Finley College, they call them like spirit boards or message boards. And they're not afraid of them. My mentors use them all the time as a means to communicate. I believe 100% it's our intention. Do we want any tool in the hands of the wrong people? No. Do I think I could safely use a Ouija board? Sure. But I also study parapsychology. I also know that we emit just enough little frequencies that we cannot really verify that we're not pushing that thing around. My take on it. Maybe I'll try it someday. I don't know. I think I did when I was like 10 with my neighbor. But we didn't know what we were doing. And of course, one of us was pushing it. OK, so tools. I think tools can have value, and I'm not dismissing tools. I loved being a tarot reader. I found so much joy and comfort with my cards. I love my angel cards. I have color cards. I still have them around. It's just that my work changed, and I don't use them anymore. I'm not saying that people shouldn't. Okay, ethics and responsibility in mediumship and psychic work. I talked about this. So when you watch TV, who watches Teresa Caputo? Freaking love her. Been to two of her shows. She's just so fun to be around. But you have to understand that as much as that looks spontaneous, those people have already signed waivers and they've already been mic'd up. So they do know a little bit about what's going on. Ethically, I will never walk up to a person in public or at a restaurant or a grocery store and be like, your mom is here. Who am I to do that? I don't know how that's going to be received. What if that's going to destroy you and you're going to get a car accident on the way home because I just upset you so badly? What if it's scary? What if that's not in your belief system? It's none of my business. And that is when I tell Spirit, find another way to get that person to me legitimately and then I will deliver your message. That said, there are people in my life who know what I do. I was getting my hair done a few years back. And she was like, okay, I'm going to go mix up the color. And I got a spirit right here. And she wants to talk. And I'm like, no, no, I'm not going to do that to her. I'm not going to bother her. It's tacky. She's working. No. But this woman is like, no, you got to talk to her. You got to talk to her. I got to talk to her. I got to talk to her. And she just won't leave. And I know I said boundaries, but this is one of those times where I'm like, okay, I know my hairstylist. And I'm going to just see how this plays out. But I'm telling the spirit, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. Then my hairstylist comes back and I'm like, oh my gosh, do you have an aunt on your mother's side in spirit? Because it gets to be where I can't hold it in. There are times where it's like, bleh, I gotta let it out. But I believe that spirit knows when I'm not gonna. So they push me when they know I can. And so it ended up being a great thing. She actually, the spirit was here for my hairstylist mom. I delivered enough information that she gave it to her mom and then she brought her mom to my house for a reading. And it was brilliant. It was so healing and wonderful. But ethics and responsibility. I also keep my readings confidential. I don't share them. I might share stories where I don't use names or examples of things that have happened, but I don't be like, oh, guess what? I saw Mary yesterday and oh my God, her dad. I don't do that. But my biggest one is the ethics of I just don't approach people. I don't think it's appropriate. And I hear people a lot say, I was at the grocery store and this lady came up to me and she told me that my grandpa's like hovering around me or that I have an attachment. Don't get me started on that, sorry. I shouldn't have said it like that. But I just don't do that. So I don't think that that's something we should do. Okay, and I'm speeding up a little because I feel bad we're taking so much time. Why validation is important. So if I said to you, your husband is here and he loves you so much and he's just really proud of all that you're doing and he knows that you're tired and blah, blah, blah. While that validation is a beautiful message. If I haven't established that I'm talking to your husband, it has less meaning, right? But if I have given you information, your husband used to do this kind of work. He used to dress like this. He really cared about his shoes. He never brushed his hair, and it was a topic of conversation. If I've given you all this stuff, you're like, that is so my husband. Remember the 500 people at the funeral in the Hawaiian shirts? Now if I tell you he loves you, that's Maybe enough, because I validated that I'm talking to him, and if his message is simply, I just need you to know I still love you. That's okay. So validation is exceptionally important to me in my work. Grief, healing, and closure. I told you at the beginning, I will stop doing this work when I stop being amazed. I am not bragging in any way when I say this. I'm merely just repeating a story. So I hear a lot of times that people are so grateful after a reading, you know, that the information they get really does help them heal. And I'm so grateful I can provide that for them. I don't take full credit. Yes, I do work on myself. Yes, I do pay attention and listen. Yes, I've learned how to deliver these messages. But I know it's not just me. There's so much more at play that I don't take all the credit. But I also mentioned I'm not a party trick. This is real work for me, and I value it very much. I only deliver messages that are helpful, hopeful, and healing. I want to help people heal. I want to give people hope, and I want to be helpful to them. It's not for fun, and don't take it lightly. I had a wife come to me for a reading, and then afterwards, she said, I got to bring my husband to you. He's a mess. And so she brought him to me. And within minutes, I'm connected with his father. And my client is just sobbing at the table. I'm telling him all these things. You know, you did this sport and that sport. And he'd love to take you to this. And he'd like to do that. And you guys did this. And he's sobbing because he's like, I've always felt like a failure. Like my dad just didn't notice me, didn't care about me. Yet I didn't know that. So I'm delivering everything from his father. And he realizes that his perception is of how his father felt about him was not correct. His father was very proud of him. And then his father delivered the best validation ever. I'm sitting there and I'm like, why am I seeing rows and rows of pristine tennis shoes? Just rows of these pristine tennis shoes. And his wife slaps the table and starts cracking up. This man... collects tennis shoes. And that's his passion. And she said he has more shoes than she has clothes. And he would clean them. They were perfect and everything. So his dad was validating, showing, I know what you're doing. I see your shoes. This is like the ribbon sealing it all up that I love you and I'm proud of you. And at the end of that reading, he literally said, I've been in therapy for 20 years. And I haven't felt as good as I feel today. And I'm like, oh my God. Okay, well, your dad. Okay. How to be prepared for a reading. We already touched on that. If you choose to have a reading with somebody, go with an open heart and an open mind. I also say this. Don't feed them information. I tell people, I only want your first name and your phone number so I can call you. I don't want you to write me a dissertation in your email. If I get an email like that on my website, I have my husband screen it. Like, tell me what I need to know. They want psychic or mediumship. And then write down their phone number for me because I don't want to read the email. Yes, we need interaction. That's the difference, though. I can't have someone like this. They try. Spirit's pretty strong and persuasive. Generally, my skeptics end up being my best ones. But you do have to interact. So I say this. Do not feed me information, but I do need you to answer me if I say, your husband, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And if you say, yes, that makes sense to me. Or no, that doesn't really make sense to me. A no is OK. Maybe I'm delivering it wrong. Spirit doesn't make mistakes. I do. But that back and forth keeps the energy up so I can keep connected to spirit and I can keep connected to you. So it's OK to validate the information or say no or maybe or I'm not sure. But you have to talk back to your person. But you don't have to supply a bunch of information. So being prepared, I also, I showed up for a group reading one time. This I will never do again. I have so many rules now. This woman and her husband wanted me to come to their house. And they wanted all their kids and kids' spouses and everybody there. And they have this living room with this big giant couch. And everybody's sitting there. And then they put one chair there. Right here for me. But behind me was a TV on bigger than this. Muted, but on. And I'm like, okay. So I'm trying to connect with their dead people, but I can feel they're just watching TV. So I have rules. You know, you got to be in a quiet place where you can listen. Please don't be driving. I have people tell me, oh, I'm going to take your call on the way home from work. I'm like, no, I don't have time for that. If you want to hear for your people, let's have some respect for them and me and yourself and the people you're driving around. So be in a quiet place where you can focus, go to the bathroom, have a nice drink, have a notepad with you. Be prepared. My mentor in England, she always says, show up for a reading like you're going to have tea with your granny. She's like, put on your lipstick. I'm like, OK, I don't wear lipstick, but I'll do other things. OK. How much time do I have, Deb? OK. Do you need to protect your energy? I don't believe so. I've had people tell me, put obsidian in your bra. Well, I did that once. And when I forgot and took my bra off, it broke on the bathroom floor. So I don't do that. I believe we are all protected already. I don't think I need to ask for protection because I'm also not doing anything that I think I need protecting from. And I know that's a controversial way to look at things and that's okay. I'm not here to convince you. My personal opinion is I believe I'm protected at all times. I believe we all are. And so I don't need to protect my energy. I also don't put myself in positions where I feel like I need to. My opinion. Okay, how often can you get a reading? This is one reason I got out of doing Tarot. People become too dependent on their readers. And I would have a fantastic reading with a client. I would give them answers to their questions and it would be beautiful. And they'd come back next week and ask the same question. They don't want personal responsibility. I'm really big on personal responsibility. I can give you all the information under the sun, but what you do with it is what matters. So if people become dependent on their reader, they're taking away from their own personal responsibility and trusting in their own instincts. When I do mediumship, I won't do it more than six months apart. I have a lady in Florida. She's 82 years old. Every six months, she gets a reading. She wants to hear from her son and her best friends from the nursing home. And we just do that. Her granddaughter gets her those as Christmas presents and trades me a massage. Psychic readings, I would say the same. I just think that people need to take time to digest the information, do something with it, put practices in place in their lives, and not rely on someone else to make their decisions for them. So I'm really big on that. I do set limits. I don't need your money that bad. I want you to be healthy. Does that make sense? I don't bend on that one. Okay, here we go. Popular myths. I'll talk a little quicker. Mediums can only guess or use cold reading techniques. Sure, most of them do. Am I guilty of sometimes seeing the look on your face and then I know? And I'm like, oh, no, that was this or that. So sure, I would say more often than not, most of us are shysters. I, for a very long time, would not use the words psychic mediums. Spiritual advisor. This or that. Because there's a connotation with it. It just is. And then one day I decided to tell the universe I own it. And I put it on my license plate. Medium. And I thought the people who need me will know. The others will think it's just something funny. And it's true. So When I first started actually doing readings, I used to think, I remembered back to being a kid in the 80s at my grandma's house, and there'd be those commercials on TV that you could call into the psychic hotline. And I remember thinking, wow, that's really cool, but how can they tell you anything about yourself over the phone? That's weird. And so I always thought that was a sham. And so then when I took my first mentorship as a medium, I'm very skeptical. And she said, okay, your homework is... You're going to do a phone reading with who I pair you up with. And I was like, oh, I can't do a phone reading. That's weird. I need to be by the person. I need to see them. Well, let me tell you, that experience was the best one ever because now I love phone readings. You know why? I can't see you. I can't read you physically. I can't see your face. I can't see whether you look happy or sad at what I said. I can't see you go, pah, or, oh. You know, so I feel that I can give you a really good reading over the phone. I don't do video anymore. I'm either in person or phone because I don't want to be accused of that. And studying parapsychology, there's a lot of blind studies they've done, really, really in-depth things. And we do a lot of it here in Tucson. It's pretty fascinating. to eliminate this as much as possible and they have had success. So I know that we can do this. I just, that we can do these readings and it be real. But I try to leave out as many chances of being accused of cold reading as possible. Okay, talking to spirits can open portals. I don't believe it. A lot of people do, and that's OK. Maybe it's a protection mechanism in myself. I'm not being snarky or snotty about it. It's just maybe I choose to believe it so that I don't conjure, as my husband would say. I know that my readings, again, helpful, hopeful, and healing. That's my intention. I set that intention. I believe that intention. And I only work with that intention. So I'm not opening anything. Plus, I don't think I'm that powerful. OK, only certain people are born with a gift. I said we would touch on this. I believe that's crap. And anybody who says that, I'd walk the other way, and I wouldn't give them a dime. I'm no more special than any of you, 100%. Any one of you can talk to your loved ones. You don't need me. You don't need someone like me. You need the openness and willingness. I believe some of us are scared out of our intuition when we're kids. And I believe some of us rationalize it away. But I think every single person is born psychic. I think it is our internal compass. It's what tells you, don't go down that dark alley at night. It's what tells you, oh, I shouldn't be dating this person. Or whatever it is, I don't think I should take that job. You're born with it. It doesn't go away. We stuff it down. Some of us just bring it back up and develop it more than others. But anybody who says they have this gift, I never say I have a gift. and that you don't, I would run away from them. Spirits are trapped and need to be sent to the light. I don't think I'm that powerful. I also don't think God makes mistakes, or whoever puts us here, I don't think they make mistake. I don't think we have that need or that right. You'll hear, if you listen to that episode about when I found out about my mediumship, that the medium that came to help me, when I didn't believe in mediums, she said that she was helping somebody in my daughter's room go to the light. And I remember thinking, that's interesting. OK, I don't know what to do with that. But the more training I had and the more time I spent in England, because they're super big on mediumship in the UK, that's when I was told God doesn't make mistakes, and it just made sense to me, and who am I to be the one to help you along the way? That's just my take on it. Okay, and we already talked about that one. Mediumship can't be done over the phone or the internet. Again, I think some of my best readings are done over the phone. Oh, okay. So, in a nutshell, In 2015, I was living in Spokane, Washington. My son was in high school. My daughter was in kindergarten. Told you there's this giant gap. And we had been actually living in Idaho, right across the border. So Idaho and Washington, everybody commutes between the two. And it was time to move out of our rental house in Idaho. And we found this house on Craigslist in Washington. And like I said, my husband being Hispanic, not a lot of people looked like my kids in Idaho. So we thought maybe we'll move to Spokane and there'd be a little bit more. And so we show up at this house to meet the owner. And he opens the door. And I looked at my husband. I said, we have to live here. I don't know why we have to live here. I hadn't even stepped in the door. We're supposed to live here. So we did the walkthrough, we did the paperwork, everything, and we moved in. And everything went to crap. Everything. My marriage was terrible. My kindergartner would not sleep. She would just wander the house at like four in the morning. Just icky, bad stuff would happen in this house. Later, If you listen to another episode with Professor Lloyd Auerbach, parapsychologist, somehow we might have been causing all of that. But whatever. It got me where I am today. So all this bad stuff was happening. Life was pretty rough. My husband lost a job. We had no money. It was just, it could not have been a harder time in our lives. And then my husband had to, and really this is so paraphrased because of timing, my husband had to take a job in California. And I had to stay with, we had four kids at the time, I had to stay so he could graduate high school and my daughter could finish kindergarten. And then we had two babies. And so there I was alone in this house. We had no family, nobody up in the Pacific Northwest. We had gone there for his job. And now I'm alone. One day, my car won't start, and I got to go pick up all my kids. It was super weird. I had driven my car that day. Everything was fine. I went to the car wash. I got the oil changed, backed my car in, put the babies down for a nap. I'll remember this day till the day I die. But my car wouldn't start. And then it dawned on me, in all the time we had lived there, no neighbors had ever come and talked to us. But I had to go meet my neighbor, because I knew she had a minivan, and I had a bunch of kids. So I go knock on her door and I'm like, hi, I'm your neighbor. My car won't start. I have no help and I got to pick up my kids and you have a minivan. And she's like, okay, I'll be right over. So we load up the kids in the car. I'm moving car seats. Glad those days are over. And we don't get but a few feet down the road when she looks at me and she's like, how are you living in that house? How are you living in that house? And I'm like, stop. Whatever you have to say, I don't want to hear it. And then I'm like, what? So then she tells me, I'm living in a murder-suicide house. And that's why she has foil in her windows, because of the evil coming out of my house. I've got two babies in the back seat, and no family, no husband, nobody with me. And I'm like, I don't even know what to do with this information right now. I know I'm late picking up my kids. It was really actually, I'm making light, but it was traumatizing. I text my husband. He calls me. He's like, get on a plane. I'm like, okay, now I'm even more scared. I'm like, well, Sam has to graduate, and Ruby has kindergarten, and I don't know what to do when I've got babies. So anyway, cliffhanger. No, if you want to listen to the episodes, you'll get all the details. And I don't earn any money. It's that tiny of a podcast. I'm not trying to sell you anything. It's just we don't have time for the story. Come to find out, there had been a man and his girlfriend. He owned the house. She lived in the house, too, with her two boys. One was autistic. They were twins. Apparently, the autistic boy caused a lot of problems in their relationship. And things got bad. She moved out. He decided to go kill her and one of the boys. And then he came home and killed himself in my house. The owner did not tell us any of this. My daughter, who's now 13, was the child who slept in the boys' room. And so that made sense after everything we put together. It made sense with things we saw on the video monitor. We have pictures from our video monitor. My son will corroborate, like, baby monitor would be pointed at the ceiling. Weird things would happen. So I had to live there a few more months, terrified. I didn't know what to do with this information. Got a hold of a friend of a friend of a friend who said she was a medium. Remember, I didn't believe in mediums, but I was like, he went to a Catholic high school. I called them. I'm like, on TV, you people help. So can you help me? And they're like, mm-mm. Later come to find out they knew where my house was. They did not want to come. But this friend of a friend of a friend puts me in touch with a medium. She came over. She did some saging. She did some magic stuff I had never seen before. And then I remember when she's all done spraying magic spray and smoke and fun things, which I make in light of now, but I use them all now. But at the time I was like, oh my God, what is she doing? We sit down on my living room floor and I look at her and I'm like, why me? Why is this happening? Why? Because now I felt tricked because I wanted to live in that house. And she goes, well, because you're a medium. And I was like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. No.
Unknown:No.
Speaker 01:And if this is what that work is like, no, thank you. And she said to me, mediums are like lanterns in the night. Spirit knows who will listen, and you listen. And I was like, yuck. At the time, I'm like, I don't want to deal with murderers. I don't want to be having this stuff happen. But now, all these years later, I can actually thank him. He brought me down this path. And do you remember earlier when I said, I firmly believe we can change on the other side? This always makes me want to cry. I feel like through me helping other people, he has tried to redeem himself. And what was interesting is, is I can remember very firmly that even though I had felt weird my whole life, I always felt like I was a weird kid. I would play and hang out with kids, but I would always feel like I was on the outside looking in. That there was a part of me that was always hanging back, and I didn't understand why. Kind of makes sense now. And I just lost my train of thought. I love this story. Where did it go? He's probably messing with me. Darn it. This is the best part. Well, his name is Jan. Oh, when she said, I'm on this path and this and that, I didn't want any part of it. Nope, nope, nope. Brain's still gone. Help me out here, Sam.
Speaker 02:Where
Speaker 01:am I going with this? This is like my favorite part. Oh, no, I know where it was. So even though I had felt weird my whole life, this is when the connection came. I know from, without a doubt, this is when I got my first reading, my first message from Spirit. So the night I find all of this out, I'm raw. My nerves are sticking out of my skin. It was awful. And I still got tiny babies and everything. I bring all my kids in my room. I bring my son in. I'm like, you're sleeping there. Babies are sleeping everywhere. We're all going to sleep together because I'm scared. I'm scared of a dead guy who did something bad. I don't know. I did not sleep a wink. I sat up in my bed all night, stick straight, watching the shadows. All night, over and over and over, all I heard was talk to the principal, talk to the principal, talk to the principal, talk to the principal. Not the principal of the Catholic high school. The principal of the kindergarten where my daughter was. I knew it intuitively. I was supposed to go talk to the principal. And that was weird to me. I was like, why am I supposed to talk to the principal? And I'm just sitting there in the dark. And you know those nights that never end? It's just the night that will not end. The sun comes up. And I wake him up. And I said, you're not going to school. You're watching your sisters. I'm supposed to go talk to the principal. It was bizarre. I get dressed. I get my kindergartener ready. We go to the school. And I knew the principal. And I walk up to her. And I'm like, we need to talk. I'm supposed to talk to you about my house. And she said, go wait in my office. I'll get the kids to class. And then I'll meet you in there. So she sits down across from me. And she's like, so what's this about? I'm like, I think you know something about my house. And she's like, well, where do you live? And so I tell her the guy's name and what happened. And she's like, oh, yeah. And what was so beautiful about him sending me there is my imagination, as with most of us, is far worse than the truth. So while he did what he did, and it was horrible. My mind had been going all night long like, oh, my God, he's just this awful, horrible murderer. He's, you know, hacking people up, and he's just evil and scary, and, you know, my mind is going nuts. She's able to tell me this was like a normal, great family. He would come to the school, volunteer. She would. The kids were great. He snapped one day. He had depression, and he just snapped. that doesn't excuse murder at all. But thinking that he was this psychopath was far scarier than realizing this man was anguished. And so that message that I got that night, to go talk to the principal, I will never forget. And I will always cherish that as really one of the first real messages from spirit that I got that put me on this path to realize how much information we can actually get from the other side. Yeah, that's it. We're done. Thank you. Aw, thanks. You're welcome. To learn more, visit me at allisnotlostpodcast.com. or reach out anytime via email at allisnotlostpodcast at gmail.com. I'll be back soon with more episodes. Until then, take care.